SCOTT & PEPA

I had two dreams last night. The first one involved my old friend Scott Jaklin. In the dream, he was a professional baseball player. His team came to Milwaukee to play the Brewers. I was in the lower grandstands with my dad, and my youngest daughter.

At one point, Scott came close to the stands. I ran down the aisle to say hi to him. I also brought my camcorder. I wanted him to say a few words for my classmate blog. He obliged. Since he was on the visiting team, I told him not to go out and get a hit. However, shortly after we spoke, he did manage to get on base. And he helped his team take a 3-2 lead.

A few innings later, I recall seeing Scott take some practice swings in the on deck circle.

Later on in the game, Miller Park somehow took on some characteristics of old County Stadium. There were some people walking on the scaffolding above our seats. And they floated down some gifts on balloons. I grabbed one, and found a board game for my daughter.

That's where the dream ended.

My second dream was more risque. It involved Pepa from the singing group Salt N Pepa. In the dream, she exposed herself from the waist down, and pointed out the semen that had dried and crusted on her inner thighs. I remember thinking how hairy she was down there. I then questioned her about the semen, because for whatever reason, I knew that in her previous sexual encounter, she ended up swallowing the guy. So no semen should have ever been near her vagina. I should point out that at no point was there ever a thought that I had been the guy she had been with.

That's where that dream ended.

DEF LEPPARD

Two nights ago I had a dream involving the rock group Def Leppard. In the dream, two members of the band were in my office. Apparently they were opening up a collection file with my law firm.

I was introduced to one of the members. He said his name was Rick Pearson. I got the impression he was the drummer. Incidentally, the real drummer's name is Rick Allen. In my dream, knowing he was the drummer, I looked to see if he was missing an arm, as the real drummer is. But I didn't notice whether he was or not. Also, Rick seemed a little standoffish to me.

That's where my dream ended.

THE DOCKS

I can't remember all the details. But I can recall only one dream from last night.

In it, I think I was a kid. And I was playing on some docks, down by the water. It seemed more like a wharf or something. It was very long, and there were shops and things. I think there was a ferris wheel at the end of it. And I think I somehow conned my way onto it without paying for it. The next thing I know, I'm being chased by some authority figures for not paying. But I ended up getting away.

That's where my dream ended.

THE MILWAUKEE BREWERS

Last night I think I had a dream. It may have been a dirty dream. Something tells me it was. But the details have been lost. I was awakened this morning by the crying of one of my daughters. And that crying somehow snatched me out of my sleep, and snatched the memory of the dream I was having.

However, two nights ago, I had a very brief dream. In it I was watching some sports show on TV. They were showing a report about a recent trade involving the Milwauke Brewers and the Philadelphia Phillies. Each team swapped two players. The Brewers dealt someone named Phil Henderson, and a second player I can't recall to the Phillies in exchange for Bobby Abreu and another player I can't recall. The TV just showed the names in text.

That's where my dream ended.

In reality, Bobby Abreu did play for the Phillies in 2006. However, he was traded to the New York Yankees in the middle of the season. As for Phil Henderson, he doesn't exist - at least not in baseball.

I don't follow baseball like I used to. And if you were to ask me which team Bobby Abreu played for, I would have had no idea. I was shocked to discover that Abreu had in fact actually played for the Phillies.

ALASKA

For the second time in recent weeks, I had a dream about Alaska.

I’m not sure where I was. But at the moment, I was by myself. I started walking down the road, lamenting the fact that I hadn’t changed into my tennis shoes. Instead, I was wearing my black dress shoes for work. They were no doubt getting dirty, as I was walking through slush. There were no sidewalks. So I ended up walking down the road, as cars whizzed by me. I somehow knew that I had to go about five miles to get to the nearest town – which I thought was Fairbanks. Remarkably, I got there only after a minute or two of walking. I then went in search of a map. So I ducked into a pizza place. It didn’t say “Pizza Hut.” But once I got inside, it was clear that it was in fact a Pizza Hut.

The next thing I knew, my wife, kids and parents were all with me. We sat down in a booth. All I wanted was a map. For some reason, it took forever to get a waitress – which was very frustrating, as we only wanted a map, and weren’t planning on eating there. We finally did get some help. And we received a cheap, paper map – which was probably printed on one of the paper placemats they give you.

We then went outside to plan our route. If we went north, we could end up at a body of water, 208 miles down the road. We could also go east or west, and find ourselves out in the wild almost immediately. I suggested we go east, where I surmised we would see lots of wildlife. By going east, we would be driving over terrain which was divided into “shelves.” What that means, I have no idea.

We ended up driving east. And it was more like a green forest than snowy tundra. Then my dream suddenly ended.

HOWARD STERN & C.C. DEVILLE

I had two dreams last night. The first one involved me being a member of Howard Stern's staff. I remember filing into a car with Howard, Robin Quivers and Artie Lange. We traveled down a road, which appeared to be Mishicot Road in Two Rivers, Wisconsin. But the next thing I knew, I was riding a bike instead. And then I was riding the bike completely naked.

I road the bike back up Mishicot Road. I'm not sure where I was headed. But I had this driving need to do something related to the radio show. I felt I had some sort of obligation to do a specific task. But I can't recall what that task was to be.

Eventually I ended up at a mall - which was the little strip mall which is attached to the Shopko store in Manitowoc, Wisconsin. It was then night time. And I became aware that it was New Year's Eve. I was running down the hallway of the strip mall, trying to reach the elevator. I was still completely naked. Then I ran into an old classmate friend of mine, Ken Bartz. Ken sort of grabbed me. He was mad that some naked guy was running in the halls. But when he saw it was me, he said something like, "Because you're a friend of mine, I'll let you go."

I then got to the elevator, and pressed the button for either the 7th or 8th floor. I was looking for Howard Stern's room. I got to the floor (which was the top floor) and then discovered that there was a lot of people up there - which was incredibly embarrassing, as I had no clothes on. To top things off, I couldn't find the room. Then I asked a woman who was the hostess of a restaurant up there, where Howard's room (with a lanai) was. She told me it was on the first floor. Great! So I got into the elvator and headed back down.

That's where my dream ended.

My next dream involved former Poison guitarest C.C. DeVille. I have no idea where we were. It was a parking lot somewhere. But he had a crack in the windshield of his pick-up truck. Then he told me how he'd gotten a new free windshield. Somehow he had a very small crack, probably caused by a small rock which hit it. He then took some sort of corrosive and applied it to the crack. That caused a large crack to appear, running the length of the windshield. For whatever reason, he apparently had insurance that would replace the windshield, if a crack happened gradually. And that's exactly what happened.

And that's where that dream ended.

BEHEADING & AN EAGLE

Last night I had three dreams. But I can only remember the second and third one.

The second dream was a weird one. I was in some neighborhood. And there was a mess in the road. There was a big pile of mud and stuff. I got a garden house and watered it all down, washing away all the mud. I was left with a few unrecognizable items. But among those items there were also two severed hands. In addition to that, there was a severed head in some sort of small cage - a birdcage or something.

Well, having all these items in the road was not a good idea. So I decided that I needed to get rid of the stuff. At no point was there an indication that I had been responsible for the severed items. But nonetheless, I felt responsible to get rid of them.

I ended up running inside a nearby house. Some white trash family lived there. The house was pretty empty for the most part. But I got help from someone. For some reason, this guy was helping me clean up the house first, before I got around to taking care of the mess in the road. When we'd finished that, I went out to the garage. The garage was huge. Inside the garage was a door which lead to what appeared to be a small apartment. It was big, considering that it was inside a garage. But it was small for an apartment I guess.

Anyway, once I left the garage, I went to the road to clean up the mess. But I discovered that everything was gone and cleaned up. There was some muddy residue where the stuff had been. But that was all that was left.

My dream then came to an end.

The next dream I had involved being in a zoo. A bunch of people were behind some glass, looking at a bald eagle, which was in this big area. I decided to go down some stairs to the right, and find another entrance to look in on the eagle. I found a door that was wide open. I walked right in (along with a few other people) and got within a few feet from the eagle, with no barriers in between. I recall looking up at the other people, who were peering through the glass where I had just been standing. In reality, I was probably thinking of my real-life experience in a zoo in Portland, Oregon, where the people can actually enter a booth, and are literally five feet from an eagle - again, with no barriers.

That's where my second dream ended.

JOY, DAVE & SATAN

Last night I had three dreams. None of them were that long, at least as far as I can remember. I think there were some additional details. But I can’t recall them. I’m not sure what order they came in. But here they are.

The first dream involved being in school. I don’t know what school I was in. But an old classmate, Joy Holtz, was there with me. She was being very nice to me. For some reason, I didn’t have anything to write on. So she let me have her yellow, spiral notebook. I remember feeling how friendly Joy was being. I think there was more to this dream – more classroom-related stuff. But I can’t remember.

The next dream involved me in a hotel room. Inside, I had two small statues (or decorations of some kind) of both Jesus and the devil. I don’t think I was doing anything Satanic. But nonetheless, at one point, something demonic occurred. I guess the devil statue somehow caused the Jesus statue to go flying across the room. It was like something out of “The Exorcist.”

I decided that I wanted to get this on film. So I put the statue back, and planned to do whatever I had done to facilitate the statue flying off in the first place. I was trying to set up the digital camera. I needed some height though. But instead of using some books or something, I tried stacking the camera on top of several other cameras. Needless to say, I was having great difficulty keeping the stack from tumbling. I even remember thinking to myself that I should get some books. But I didn’t. And that’s pretty much where that dream ended.

My third dream involved my old friend Dave Svatek. For some reason, I was at his house – which was his parents’ house actually. I remember I was really tired when I got there. It was early in the morning. I must have arrived with my parents. Because we were all there for dinner – or perhaps breakfast. When I got there, I was yawning. Dave had his bed set up in the kitchen. And he was very tired too. I believe he had just gotten up. He was also yawning. I briefly saw Dave’s dad wander from the kitchen to the living room. Once he left, Dave’s new kitten showed up. It was an orange tabby. The kitten jumped from the bed, into the kitchen cupboards. It then made its way through the cupboards, weaving in and out between the dishes and the glasses.

The last thing I recall is walking into the living room – where the table was set up. I had already eaten a piece of pepper cheese. But I reached and grabbed one more piece. Dave sort of looked at me as if to chide me for eating so much, as there were only a few pieces left. But he didn’t say anything.

That’s where the dream ended.

DOUG & TOM

Last night's dream was very short - at least what I can recall.

I was on my front porch. Although it wasn't my house in real life. It more resembles my parents' home. Anyway, I was with an old middle school friend of mine by the name of Tom Grassman. I think we were out raking leaves or something. Suddenly an old frined of both of ours, Doug Wall, strolled by. Now in real life, the last time I saw Doug (six months ago) he was mad at me. So I went up to him and said, "Are you still mad at me?" He sort of smiled, then engaged in a little bit of small tak with me. Then he went to talk to Tom for awhile, before leaving.

I remember feeling a sense of relief that my old friend was no longer mad at me. Of course in real life, he probably still is. That's where my dream ended.

NORTH TO ALASKA

Perhaps inspired by our upcoming trip to Alaska, last night I had a dream about it.

In the dream, I was participating in some sort of contest. I was to drive to Alaska in a specified amount of time. I ended up driving some sort of beat-up, maroon-colored van. But I made it. At one point, I was suddenly given an aerial view as I crossed into the Anchorage city limits. It was either Anchorage or Fairbanks, one of the two.

Anyway, I pulled into the Comfort Inn. Incidentally, both cities do actually have a Comfort Inn. Once I was in the parking lot of the hotel, I suddenly got an aerial view again. And this time I was in a parachute. I could actually "feel" the exhileration of flying. But I was actually coming down. Anyway, once I landed, I was myself again. And the person with the parachute was some sort of hired hand from the sponsors for the contest.

I checked into the hotel, and headed towards my room. I think I had room "F." The place had a log cabin motif. I noticed that the doors to the rooms were made out of wood. And when I looked closer at them, I noticed that they were made in Racine, Wisconsin. I had to walk through some sort of large room. In the room were some partiers. One woman shouted "Woohoo!" In my mind, I was thinking, "Great, these people are going to keep me up all night." What they were happy about is that the Colts had won the Super Bowl. There was some Colts stuff hanging up in the place.

I got to my room and sat on the bed. There was not one, but two TV's in the room. One of them was a huge plasma screen. Then my phone rang. It was some sort of collection call. For some reason, I knew that the woman speaking to me was from Tupelo, Mississippi. But the woman was speaking Spanish. I told her that I didn't understand what she was saying. Then she said, (in perfect English) "When we called you four years ago, you spoke fluent Spanish." I replied, "No I didn't."

Then my alarm clock rang and woke me up.

DOGS

Last night I had an odd dream. It's very hard to describe. But I'll try.

I was in some sort of pet cage. It was gigantic. I was there to swap pets. The pets were a combination of my own pets, as well as my parents'. There were cats and dogs. My duty was to get all of the animals out of one pen, and get another set of animals inside to take their place. I believe I accomplished my goal. Then the dream ended.

HOME, APARTMENT & SCHOOL

Last night I had a couple of dreams. I don't recall which order they came happened though.

One dream involved our old house in Port Washington, which we are currently in the process of selling. We have an accepted offer. Anyway, my wife and I were driving by the house. I noticed something looked strange about it. Apparently she didn't. So I told her to turn around and drive by again. As we approached it, I said, "Look at the deck." We don't have a deck on the house. So I figured the would-be new owner had already done some work on the place. But no, when we drove by, we noticed that almost the entire house was gone. There was a pool of water standing in a portion of the foundation. I wasn't alarmed though. I knew we had an accepted offer. So the fact that the house had been leveled didn't bother me.

The next dream I had, I found myself riding a bike. Again, my wife was with me. We were riding down the interstate, when suddenly traffic stopped. It turned out there was a bit of flooding on the road. So the cops were rerouting the cars around the water. Once we got past, we stopped about a half-mile up the road, near a wooded area. We did this because my wife thought she saw our cat, Jake.

I stopped and grabbed the orange tabby. But it seemed too small to be Jake. Plus, because it was apparently a baby, it still had its frog legs. Yes, the baby cat was kind of a half-cat/half-frog combination. I looked at the cats claws, knowing that the real Jake lost a claw this past summer, and is just now growing it back. This cat/frog had all its claws. So I knew it wasn't Jake. Then we saw a second cat/frog in the woods. That too wasn't Jake. So it was time to go. I pointed out to her that the cops behind us must have closed down the road from the flooding, because no cars had passed us in several minutes. So we got back on the bike and went forward.

The next thing I recall, she and I were talking about the layout of our first apartment together. Neither one of us could recall what the bathroom looked like. The rest of the apartment we pretty much described accurately - except for the fact that what we were describing was not the first apartment we had in real life.

The next thing I know, we're in a different apartment - or possibly a house. I was getting ready to go to school. So I left, taking my bike again. I'm not sure how far I actually rode. But it was either raining, or the roads were wet. And I ended up getting muddy. Not wanting to go to school dirty, I turned around and went home. I found my wife and her mom hanging out at home. I told them I needed to change my clothes. But I couldn't find anything to wear. So then I decided that I was just going to stay home. The next thing I know, I'm laying on my bed, talking to my friend Meff on the phone. I told him I was ditching school that day. He seemed surprised and impressed.

That's where my dream came to an end.

MY WIFE'S HIGH SCHOOL

Last night I had a dream where I went back to high school. But even though there were some of my past classmates there, (such as Al Wegner and Treesa Carron) it was not my high school. Instead, It was my wife's high school.

I recall being on the third floor, and opening up my locker to get my books. I remember having a nervous feeling, as I was unsure of my surroundings, being that it was a new school.

I went into class, and took a desk near my wife. It was also next to Treesa. In real life, I'd always had somewhat of a crush on Treesa. So I liked being near her. And I was having a good time making her laugh.

At some point I had to go to the bathroom. This was probably brought on by the fact that as I was sleeping, I did actually have to go. So I got up from my seat, and merely motioned to the teacher (a woman) that I was leaving the room to go to the bathroom. When she spotted me, she nodded that it was ok for me to leave.

When I got into the hall, I was sort of lost. The layout of the school was very strange. It didn't have straight, long hallways. The hallways were curved, and I couldn't see too far ahead. So I just kept walking forward, looking for the bathroom. Eventually I found it - both the girls and the boys. But the boys bathroom was out of order. It seemed to be the only bathroom on that floor. So I ended up going down to the second floor. I wandered the entire length of the second floor. And no bathroom could be found.

So I then had to go down to the first floor. Yet for whatever reason, I still couldn't find a bathroom. I ended up going into the library. Then I finally found it! I went inside. But instead of a row of urinals, the wall was bare. But right in the middle of the floor was a big hole. The idea was that the guys were supposed to just stand over the hole and go. No one else was there. I had to go. So I did. It felt great.

Then I left the library and headed back up to the third floor. I was still frustrated, as the hallways were confusing. It was so frustrating that I knew that by the time I got back to class, I'd have to go again. This was no doubt caused by the fact that in real life, I actually hadn't gone.

My dream seemed to end somewhere during my trek back up to the third floor.

WORLD WAR II

In the early morning hours of Wednesday, January 31st, 2007, I had a dream where I was involved in World War II.

At times, the dream switched back and forth from being real, to being the filming of a movie about World War II. But for the most part, it was real. The only "movie" part I can recall was an explosion. And several people were blown into the air. I then saw them all land safely on some sort of big blown-up mat.

But other than that part, the rest of the dream was "real." In it, I was in a small town. I don't know how I knew it was World War II. I just did. Well, the Germans were moving in and attacking this town. For some reason, the entire town was surrounded by a big fence. And the Germans were guarding all the exits. So there was literally nowhere to escape. I remember bombs or missiles going off, and hitting some scaffolding on the sides of the buildings. There were hundreds of people on the scaffolding at the time. And once it hit, the scaffolding collapsed on itself. And all the people came tumbling down, presumably to their death.

The bombs and missiles were more like cannonballs. And you could see them coming. At one point, I ducked into some sort or gazebo or something. One of these cannonballs crashed through the window, and I got covered with debris. But I had been running away from where I knew it was going to hit. So I got a bit dirty, but ended up being completely unharmed.

That's pretty much where it ended.

THE TITANIC

When I woke up on Tuesday, January 30th, 2007, I realized I'd had a dream about the Titanic. And it played out like the movie.

Believe it or not, I was in the title role of Jack. I don't think I was literally Jack. I was still me. But I was in his role. Anyway, the details are sketchy at best. But in the dream, I know for a fact that I fell in love with a woman - know doubt inspired by Kate Winslet's character "Rose" in the film. I must admit that the feeling of falling in love with her was incredibly wonderful. I recall hugging her as we looked out over the water.

I don't recall much of anything else. But I do remember an underlying fear that the ship was in fact sinking.

EXECUTING CLASSMATES

Ok, in the early morning hours of Monday, January 29th, 2007, I had an odd dream – seriously odd. I had a job in a department store of some kind. What was my profession? Did I work at the checkout? Did I stock items? Oh no… I was an executioner.

Every store has one, don’t they?

And I wasn’t just in charge of executing nameless, faceless criminals. No, I was in charge of strapping former classmates into the electric chair. I think I killed four or five people. I can’t recall all of them. But two of the departed were fellow “Class Of 1989” blog entries of mine, Stacey Erickson and Markus Petkevicious. What had they done? I don’t know. But I strapped them in, and gave them the juice.

And then it got weird.

The next person to get strapped in was Jason Anderson. So I did my job. I put the strap on his skull, and pulled the switch. A few moments later, Jason slumped to the floor. Then I went to check on him. He was still alive! So he got up, completely out of breath, and in obvious pain. I commended him on his ability to stay alive. Then he wandered around the store a bit. And not unexpectedly, he received a lot of sympathy from people – people including his friend and fellow classmate, Jay Rozmarynoski. Becky Koeppel also showed up to give her support. I of course hovered next to Jason for the most part – so he wouldn’t run away, I imagine. I happened to have my digital camera on me. And not wanting to miss a photo opportunity, I asked Becky if I could take a picture of her, as I didn’t (and don’t) have a recent one of her for my class blog. But she declined. When I asked her why, she said she didn’t approve of my blog because of some of the negative aspects of it. Specifically, she pointed out that Stacey Erickson had left some bad comments about Kevin Dehne. For the record, she hasn’t.

Well, as the dream continued, I myself was pretty shook up about it. I was torn. In one aspect, I too was moved by Jason’s experience and wanted him to live. On the other hand, I felt I was duty-bound to do my job. I was very upset. And at one point, I started crying. For the record, Jason was crying too. I even asked him if he had some place he could disappear to, if I happened to let him go. He said he did.

In the end, my duty ethics won out. I sort of lead Jason back to the electric chair. At one point he decided to bolt. For a brief second, I thought about appealing to Jason’s pride, and had thought about saying something like, “Jason, it’s time to man up. Be a man and don’t run away.” But I didn’t have to go that route. Jason’s run lasted for only a second or two. He happened to run right toward the electric chair. And once he saw it, he stopped. He even put the electric strap on his own head.

As Jason sat down in the chair, the coroner showed up. He had come to take the body away. He was 45 minutes late. But since Jason survived the first shock, it all worked out. Once the coroner was there, I knew there was no way I could let Jason go now.

So anyway, I placed the hood over Jason’s head, and flipped the switch. As I looked back at Jason, I saw that he had somehow managed to get the hood off. So he was looking right at me. Knowing that the jolts of electricity could cause his eyes to come out of their sockets, I pleaded with him to close his eyes tight. It was really loud. So I had to scream it at him. I was thinking that there would be less pain if his eyes stayed in his head. I was genuinely motivated to have his suffering as painless as possible. Jason obliged and shut his eyes. Determined not to have a repeat performance, I let the electricity flow through him longer than normal. Eventually, Jason’s body slumped to the floor. After I turned off the juice, the coroner confirmed that Jason was in fact dead.

After Jason was dead, I decided that I was going to quit my job, effective immediately. It was too horrible to go on any further.

And that’s pretty much how my dream ended.

I must admit, when I woke up, I was a bit disturbed at this dream. Killing these classmates was an absolutely awful feeling. I don’t recall ever having a dream like this before.

So my question is this. What does this dream mean? Can anyone interpret it? I’m too lazy to check the internet myself. I’m not sure I want the “answer.” I’d like to know what others think.

Anyone?

WELCOME TO MY SLEEPING MIND

This is a blog where I intend to document all of my dreams. I have a tendency to forget my dreams not long after I have them. So now I intend to keep them forever. Welcome and enjoy!